Everything seems quite funny since the love is gone. Seriously, when two people don't love each other anymore, those sweet words, promises, hugs and kisses just don't mean anything. Isn't that sad? Should we throw all this away just beacuse of the fading love?
Recently I've been thinking about this--how things gonna work after lovers broke up. I, am more like the "remember everything' guy in love. I don't believe you can get rid of those memories so easily. I don't mean that I would remember all stuff about the relationship, but I do believe that once you loved someone, that guy would left prints on your heart.
Why would I bring this up? Again, it's coz I just watched some episode of FRIENDS. :)
Anyone who wanna share his opinions about this get-over-with thing is welcome to post a comment here.
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Often, when people desperately want to do something, they go to the other extreme, just like the case in point; when a person you care so deeply about has left, you can't put him/her out of your mind, so you do the opposite of what you truly want. You mentioned Friends, and I suppose you were talking about the Ross+Rachel relationship (or maybe even Emily). Well, Friends is a TV series that relates closely to our life experience. It's gained such popularity because everyone can relate to the characters. So while what the two lovers have done may not be right, but it's still considered normal behavior to suppress such strong feelings to spare yourself the pain, at least temporarily. It may not be the smartest thing to do, but that's human nature.
hi, friend from Plurk *smile* Actually, I didn't think of Friends when I wrote this article. It's based on a true story from one of my good friends. I agree "It may not be the smartest thing to do, but that's human nature." I used to say, "If you didn't do something stupid in love, then you didn't truly fall in love." :)
I've been wondering about the same thing lately. How does it work, once love fades. I wonder a step further, is it really possible to remain "friends as friends" once you're out of love? How do you put aside those memories and affections, and go back to being "just friends"? I'm still trying, so maybe I'll have a little more to say that is actually meaningful later on. Once I figure it all out.
It is not easy to get over somebody you once loved. Time! Only time can heal the broken heart. As the time goes on, the memories fade. It is easy to forgive but difficult to forget.
you mentioned two wonderful words: forgive and forget. I would like to ask a Q--which one is easier, to forgive or to forget? OR...they are both sides of one thing? In my case, it's easier for me to forget coz I have a bad memeory. However, I would never say I forgave someone...
You can not "forgive" because the memories of your past still linger. It is not easy to shake those memories because the past relationship is still an important chapter of your life. However, if you decide that the chaper is no longer important to you and forgive that person who caused the hardship, you would cease to cling on to those bitterness in your heart. "Memory" is the imprint in your heart, but "forgiveness" is a state of mind. I think it is easier for me personally to change the state of mind than erase the imprint of memories. (Gosh, I have super memories for things that are significantly important to me but terrible for others.) But, I am not a relationship therapist. If my words count for something, I probably would have published my book or got a phone call from Oprah long time ago. Hehehe...
well, my memory of someone could be gone as time goes by, but the next time I see him/her, I would recall feelings about him/her. that's why I said I could forget but not forgive.